I am exhausted. Work was super hard today and my boss doesn’t seem to get that I’m still not completely pain free just because I’ve been on steroids for my sciatica for about 4 days now. Yes, I am feeling better and I am still pushing through the pain which is about 50-60% less than it was when I went to the doctor’s on Monday, but I am STILL having periodic nerve spasms that make me want to hit the floor because it hurts that badly. It also didn’t help that today, we were being observed by the person in charge of menus who was introducing a new item that she wanted us to serve–fish sandwiches with cheese, pickles and barbecue sauce.
We fumbled through it the first lunch, because she wasn’t even sure how she wanted us to serve it to the kids. Also, apparently, we couldn’t have our fish patties in our wells because it was “gross”. We had to pre-make the sandwiches with the cheese (which got all melty and gross) and present them in a basket with barbecue sauce and pickles on the side. NOBODY wanted the damn barbecue sauce though. And at least half the kids asked if we could make it without cheese, which we could not. But we learned that pre-making the sandwiches and letting them sit in the warmer made the buns hard, which was also ‘gross’ (which I totally agree). It was like we were stuck between a rock and a hard place and it really really sucked. We were short people today, as well, and so we were running our asses off trying to keep up with everything that the boss and the menu person wanted as well as keep up on dishes and whatnot. It was exhausting.
I don’t know what to do about my boss. I try not to complain because what good would that do? But her serious lack of empathy is starting to wear on me. I am doing the best that I can, but it doesn’t seem to be good enough for her. I worked all week last week when I was in pain that would’ve driven a lesser person to their knees in tears. I am STILl in pain and I’m working through it because she would give me so much SHIT if I didn’t.
I cannot help that I have physical and mental issues that sometimes make working PERIOD (wouldn’t matter what the damn job was) difficult. She makes me feel like shit sometimes because of my anxiety and depression. I cannot help that I have mental issues…I am doing the best I fucking can and that’s ALL I can do. But it just fucking WEARS ME THE HELL OUT sometimes. I don’t know what’s going on in her personal life that’s causing her to be so shitty but I swear, if I make it to the end of this school year, I am going to look for a different job or something this summer because I JUST CANNOT with her anymore. My coworkers are kind of awesome, but you can’t stay just because your coworkers are awesome. I wish I could. She was already harping on how next year, when she moves to a new school (it’s being built right now) she is GOING to be on everybody’s ass because she expects us to keep it pristine. It’s a kitchen..it’s not GOING to be pristine past the first couple of weeks, if that long. I’m sorry, but she has unreasonable expectations of how it’s going to be next year (in my opinion anyway).
It’s the weekend. I’ve got shit to do (mainly laundry) but I’m going to take tonight off, watch Iron Man 3 and Captain America: The Winter Soldier (those are the ones I’m up to right now in my quest to watch all of the MCU movies in order so I can watch Avengers: Endgame or whatever the shit everybody was flipping out about this time last year) and work on my baby sea turtle beach blanket thing. Because I’ll be DAMNED if my weekend is ruined because she’s trying to do a number on my damned head. FUCK that shit.
Pass the tequila.
